Sunday, 29 March 2015

Just Run

  In the last six months I've traded in both of my old knees for new metal ones. I'm sure they're actually made of metal as I have set off the detector in our local courthouse the last three times I was there. I had a thought of showing the security guard my scars but apparently I look old enough to have knee replacements and not criminal looking enough for him to worry about it. (The reason for these abundant court visits is another subject entirely which I haven't figured out how to write about in a truthful but sensitive manner.)   About the knees - they are crazy amazing and I don't know why I waited to have them done.  They were jacked up for so long, that I had to re-remember how to walk, which if you think too hard about, actually confuses you even more.
  Standing in the kitchen the other day,  pondering my new abilities,  I suddenly had an idea.....I could run.  Not run like in a marathon, just run- as in across the kitchen. A few kids were standing around and apparently I had spoken out loud, so they urged me on with chants of "Do it Mom."  I gave it a try. Now I've had some awkward moments in my life but they were all topped by this attempt at what should have been easy. Not only did I not move fast in any way, but my body was doing some cross between the Tin Man and the Scarecrow. The crowd reaction was the kind of laughter that gets you choking because you can't stop. Feeling sorry for me I suppose, one of the boys sweetly said, "You go girl." 
  Not wanting to admit defeat in something that I have able to do since being a two year old, I have decided to perfect my running form while alone. Well, not completely alone.  Just as it starts getting dark I take the dog for a walk around the block. When I've checked to make sure that there's no one in sight, I run.  The first time I tried, my jerky movements  so startled the dog that he bolted, accelerating my speed. It took awhile to slow him down during which time I think I may have improved some what. 

 Warning to my neighbors - you may see something flash down the road but don't worry it's just me running - sort of.

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